been tucked in your pocket for the last hundred days and when i don't get my bath i take it out on the slaves

so i applied for a job at greenpeace today.

i know what you're all thinking.
i was thinking it too.

but don't worry, dear friends. i'm not about to relinquish the magically cleansing properties that make up soap and toothpaste. i'm also not about to quit smoking- so back off you long-haired, mangy hippies!

bartending and waitressing is all well and good- but you can only fake-smile your way through the sinfully boring minutae of your customer's lives so many times before you either a)take their lives, b)take your own life, or, c)find another job. so it's come to that. at times when i'm punching out my time card at work i think to myself that if i have to work even one more day there- the end result is going to be carnage. that is to say, i'm only a few short fuses away from going tom cruise on someone's ass. no one wants to see that, least of all me.

so it's time to move along little doggy. greenpeace at least seems like a step in the right- er- left direction. maybe then i'll start curbing my ever-delightful masochistic tendency of reminding myself daily that if i had have finished school instead of taking a break- i'd be done my degree and working somewhere worthwhile by now.

how fun!