move along, little doggy
it's over.
(for real this time).
i picked up my things.
he apologized.
a variant of the 'it's not you, it's me' chestnut.
(yeah i know who it is).
asked me if i wanted a cigarette.
uh, no thanks...i wanted your heart, silly.
the cab took forever to arrive.
i tripped on the stairs while leaving.
thoroughly traumatizing.
went home.
wrote a letter.
went back to drop it off.
watched him get into a car with a friend.
off to a bar, i imagine.
good time to celebrate.
(that's probably not true...just wish it was so i could trade sad with angry).
i'll get over this.
one day.
i have to get over it.
just have to get the tears out of my system
first.
dry up.
toughen up.
can't be a puppy anymore.
how can you miss what you never had?
easy.
re-read this today.
wrote it the day after.
day after what?
you know what day it was.
why do i re-read these things?
glutten for punishment, i am.
oh well.
that's enough.
enough being heartbroken for one day.
(for real this time).
i picked up my things.
he apologized.
a variant of the 'it's not you, it's me' chestnut.
(yeah i know who it is).
asked me if i wanted a cigarette.
uh, no thanks...i wanted your heart, silly.
the cab took forever to arrive.
i tripped on the stairs while leaving.
thoroughly traumatizing.
went home.
wrote a letter.
went back to drop it off.
watched him get into a car with a friend.
off to a bar, i imagine.
good time to celebrate.
(that's probably not true...just wish it was so i could trade sad with angry).
i'll get over this.
one day.
i have to get over it.
just have to get the tears out of my system
first.
dry up.
toughen up.
can't be a puppy anymore.
how can you miss what you never had?
easy.
re-read this today.
wrote it the day after.
day after what?
you know what day it was.
why do i re-read these things?
glutten for punishment, i am.
oh well.
that's enough.
enough being heartbroken for one day.
posted by diadima at 1:21 AM
6 Comments:
I'm sorry about the traumatic tripping, that probably wasn't the exit you were hoping for. This is probably best, he didn't seem like good news.
I've been heartbroken for years, eventually the pain becomes normal and the happy becomes the variant. You are an exceptional person, I just wish that someone special to you would realize it. What the fuck is wrong with them?
Chin up, young person.
And I'm sorry you tripped.
I'm drinking whiskey from the bottle, you want some?
lmk: no not the exit i was hoping for. in fact i was hoping for no exit at all.
nicky: you're the best. whiskey straight from the bottle would be awesome right now.
underhill: you would be a druck (drunken duck). i know, not permanent in the realm of reality- but i live in fantasy land. in fantasy land every sentence is written in poetry and none of them come from happy places.
if i had my way
i'd never get over you
the emotional monster
i've tied myself to.
I still want to hit him with the rubber chicken with the brick inside.
I hope you didn't skin your knee.
but hey, now you're one person closer to finding a Good One. and I have no doubt that a Good One is coming your way - you are a beautiful, talented, fabulous woman - these things work themselves out.
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