this hope and optimism i wear will grow out like the highlights in my hair
i want this bruise on my knee to go away
so i can stop bursting into tears
every time i see it.
reminding me of why it's there.
i watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
last night.
fell asleep on the couch in my clothes.
woke up in a puddle.
crying in my sleep.
hair stuck to my forehead and cheeks.
wanted to erase you.
at the same time,
wanted you to be here to say
"please don't erase me"
i wanted to be ok
but i'm not ok.
need to make a change.
cut my hair.
change myself.
can't stand looking in the mirror
seeing what you saw
what you pushed away, pushed out
grew tired of
and didn't want anymore.
tomorrow you're getting on a plane.
going back to england for a bit.
the last time you went
i said
"next time i'm hiding in your suitcase"
you said
"or you could sit in the seat next to me".
had some plans
like so many plans
as it turned out
they just looked good
on paper.
so i can stop bursting into tears
every time i see it.
reminding me of why it's there.
i watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
last night.
fell asleep on the couch in my clothes.
woke up in a puddle.
crying in my sleep.
hair stuck to my forehead and cheeks.
wanted to erase you.
at the same time,
wanted you to be here to say
"please don't erase me"
i wanted to be ok
but i'm not ok.
need to make a change.
cut my hair.
change myself.
can't stand looking in the mirror
seeing what you saw
what you pushed away, pushed out
grew tired of
and didn't want anymore.
tomorrow you're getting on a plane.
going back to england for a bit.
the last time you went
i said
"next time i'm hiding in your suitcase"
you said
"or you could sit in the seat next to me".
had some plans
like so many plans
as it turned out
they just looked good
on paper.
posted by diadima at 2:05 PM
9 Comments:
My poor pussycat!
I just want to hug you and make you soup and make you feel better.
That sucks. Pain.
what kind of soup?
(thanks ubie:)
One day, a woman was crying in a park,
An angel said:” Why are you crying”
The woman said “Because my boyfriend left me, I am so in love with him”
The angel said “Oh dear don’t cry. Actually, he should cry, not you.
The woman said:” Why?”
The angel said “you just lost a boy who doesn’t love you. But he lost a girl whom loves him so much!”
Suddenly, the woman smile and walked out of the park
I hope this poem serves you well and remember it is always darkest right before dawn!
D'
jesus, what can be said without sounding trite?
ubie can make the soup, i'll make you a nice furry pimp jacket. any color you like.
I know I said this in a comment many posts ago, but your writing is amazing. I'm going to link you on my blog. Hope that's cool with you. :-)
You so have everything you need.
annon: wtf?
gin: it has to be pimptastic pink.
rramone: thanks for the link, and the nice comments- it's much appreciated.
Last night she disappeared (Today a new sun)
Last night she disappeared
The bonds have been broken.
Left behind a heart
heavy, yet empty.
Last night she disappeared
into the arms of another.
And took with her my dreams -
I thought they were ours.
Last night she disappeared
but she did leave traces.
Remains of desire and hope,
folly and jackassdom.
Last night she disappeared
eclipsed by the clouds.
Today in the darkness,
I search for a new sun.
my dear adria, i don't know anything about anything, so i can't give any wise advice or be helpful in any way. but you know how awesome we all think you are, and if you need anything - in addition to the soup and pimpjacket - give a yell. i could make you some avocado, ham and brie stuffed potatoes for only 3.5 weight watchers points per serve?
Words to live by or not:
Mary reads to Dr. Mierzwiak out of "Bartlett's Familiar Quotations"; the lines are from Alexander Pope's poem "Eloisa to Abelard"]
Mary: How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot! / The world forgetting, by the world forgot / Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! / Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.
U know the movie ; )
Smooch,
The Tart
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